Now What?

It's always exciting to get a new teacher, especially when they appear to be an alright person. I am kinda worried because, although I have nothing against change, it can be difficult to do sometimes. I'm kinda curious as to how the new guy will go about teaching. I like that he's coming in early to get a feel for the classroom, but I think peoples' opinions are still on the edge because he hasn't actually taught us yet. He could just be friendly now and end up being really strict later on.

I'm not sure the point ledger was a very good method of getting points for me. It helped me a lot when Mr. Good taught my class last year for Mr. Steele, but this year I just don't have enough motivation to actually write for a class. I do it plenty on my own time, but when I write on my own, I don't think about what's going onto the page and it tends to be choppy and confusing to other people. I then have to go back after finishing something, like a chapter, for example, and edit it so it's less confusing, or more descriptive. Whatever it needs.

The class has helped plenty so far, and I hope it helps loads more in the months to come.

A Locked House

As we drove back, crossing the hill,

The house still

Hidden in the trees, I always thought—

A fool’s fear—that it might have caught

Fire, someone could have broken in.

As if things must have been

Too good here. Still, we always found

It locked tight, safe and sound.

I mentioned that, once, as a joke;

No doubt we spoke

Of the absurdity

To fear some dour god’s jealousy

Of our good fortune. From the farm

Next door, our neighbors saw no harm

Came to the things we cared for here.

What did we have to fear?

Maybe I should have thought: all

Such things rot, fall—

Barns, houses, furniture.

We two are stronger than we were

Apart; we’ve grown

Together. Everything we own

Can burn; we know what counts—some such

Idea. We said as much.

We’d watched friends driven to betray;

Felt that love drained away

Some self they need.

We’d said love, like a growth, can feed

On hate we turn in and disguise;

We warned ourselves. That you might despise

Me—hate all we both loved best—

None of us ever guessed.

The house still stands, locked, as it stood

Untouched a good

Two years after you went.

Some things passed in the settlement;

Some things slipped away. Enough’s left

That I come back sometimes. The theft

And vandalism were our own.

Maybe we should have known.

By W. D. Snodgrass

I was going to read this poem for Poetry Out Loud but I got cold feet. So here it is anyway!

What Have I Learned?

In the time since October 15th, I've learned plenty. I will admit, I was not a fan of Ms. McKenna. I don't think I have the right to judge her now, as a student who knew her for under three months. She didn't seem to be very interested in the class to me, which is a problem in my eyes. It appeared almost as if we annoyed her and she didn't always understand what I was saying to her or what the actual meanings of the questions I asked were, as she'd have some far-off answer that had nothing to do with what I'd asked. Another problem I had was the way she assigned work. She rarely told us flat out when assignments were do, what she wanted the main ideas of said assignments to be, and didn't give(me, if not anyone else) space for creativity. She often asked me to change my work into a style that I assume fit her better than it would fit me.

I don't mean to bash on this teacher. I just felt very wrong being in a class of people who cared about her (for the most part) deeply, when I really wasn't a fan. I did feel upset for the loss of her, but more because it was a loss of life rather than the loss of Alison McKenna. Guilt was the biggest problem. Sitting in that room on the Monday following her death was almost disgraceful. I had no right to feel bad for her death. I didn't know her, nor did I very much like her at all. It was like tainting all the sadness and love that people had for the situation with simply not caring. My friends(hopefully you aren't reading this) left I think somewhat to get away from the sadness, but for the most part to just skip class. Which, I think is also disgraceful.

So, something this has taught me? It's been an intuitive experience. I've realized things about myself. Like the fact that I can't comprehend the concept of death. I don't understand how people can simply be gone. And maybe this is why religion was born. To give people an answer and to give them hope. So that they can know where their deceased loved ones are, or have an explanation to how people came to be on this Earth, whatever they question, religion is supposed to have an answer for them. In all honesty, I have theories about such things, but I think anything is really possible. Which is why it's hard for me to take in death. It's almost like denial, like I can't believe they're gone so I subconsciously tell myself that they've only left for a time. I get it when it's from a distance, like in a book, or another country, or someone I don't know well.

While losing Ms. McKenna was a painful experience for most, I was one of few, I’m sure, that just didn’t care. I suppose that can be considered pretty heartless, and what I’m about to say doesn’t make me seem any less so; not understanding death doesn’t change how I feel about it altogether. I don’t think of death as such a bad thing. I think everyone has to die someday, and to be perfectly honest, I don’t think it’d be too bad to die young. No wrinkles, no problem. No, I don’t want to die tomorrow or anytime soon. Maybe in my 80’s if I’m able. All I’m saying is that, while life is valuable while it’s being lived, it’s also expendable. Our population grows rapidly every day. One person is nothing to the billions of others on Earth.

I have no idea how to conclude a post like this, so I’ll end it generically:

The End

Fast Write!

I think getting pregnant young should be some form of illegal. It's like condemning newborns to horrible lives. Teens around the world use pregnancy as an attention option. Nowadays, there are shows that have almost a hidden meaning, "Pregnant at sixteen = good!". No. Girls use babies to keep boyfriends, as well. It's emotional blackmail. Why any moronic girl would plan on being with child as a teen is beyond me. That being said, I can also add that I have nothing against abortion. Would you prefer to give your child such an unhealthy life over not giving them to chance to experience it at all? I can see the valid arguments on both sides, but my opinion stands. Kids are a massive responsibility and any teenager that thinks they're ready for a baby, let alone to try to conceive to keep "Mr. Perfect" is immature to no end.